And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
