I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
