Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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