guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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