You're my little dorito
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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