im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
