What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
