arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
My penis needs a shock collar
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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