...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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