I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
