Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I puked a lego.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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