I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Randomize