I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
do nipples grow back?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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