That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
