When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
