I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
