we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I can feel your judgement through the phone
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
