Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
The air was thick with penises
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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