we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
