Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize