Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
