Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
