I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
