I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Randomize
