Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
