So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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