Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
