it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
false alarm, still single
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
