Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
