Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
All the doctor said was why
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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