If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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