Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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