sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
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