We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
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Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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