she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I think my moral compass just broke
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
