No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
