Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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