Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
