just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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