"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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