best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Couch. On fire.
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