Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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