I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
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