if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
