I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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