Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
