i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
