After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
