Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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