Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
